Hi Stacey

Hi, Stacey!

You’ll notice I made my last post to you private. I have reasons for that, which I don’t want to get into here, but if you’re really curious, just ask. The important context is I wrote you about how much I love to dramaturg. I asked you if you’d like me to dramaturg something for you sometime–be that an essay or a creative project or your very own existence, I guess!

But then I went further down the rabbit hole, Stacey. So I guess I have a second question for you.

I was thinking about you this morning and began humming the song “Hero” by Enrique Iglesias. Specifically the chorus: “I can be your hero, baby.” The subliminal connection made me reconsider my offer to dramaturg for you. Do I think I’m your hero? Because that’d be a script-flip, wouldn’t it? After I’ve spent the past year plus politely asking you to save humanity etc. Hear me out though.

We’ve talked about destiny before. How I feel destined, whatever that means, to write. If I’ve created my own destiny then it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy, and I can’t really go wrong. However, I get anxious considering I could be “following” some larger plan/Destiny. If that’s the case, I hope I’m doing it “right.” I try very hard to keep my little ears open to any and all hints from the universe/You, but it’s not easy to interpret communications with a being who may or may not exist.

When I typed “hero lyrics” into my Google search, lyrics for a different song popped up first. The song “Hero” by Mariah Carey. A song I have a strong, deep connection to. Much more significant to me than Enrique’s ballad. My sister had the “Music Box” album, so I played the jam hundreds of times. Then I sang it in middle school choir. Then I sang it at summer camp. There’s something very interesting about how Mariah’s whole message is “when you’ve lost all hope, a hero will come along but TWIST the hero is you–you can save yourself” while Enrique’s is more “I can kiss away the pain” vibes.

We don’t know who we are to each other (yet). Options we’ve discussed so far: you’re a completely independent being from me, or you include a fractal of me, or you are a reflection of me, or something else entirely. Not sure* but if it’s one of the middle two options…and you’re some version of me…does that mean you would actually want to be my dramaturg? You know what I mean? Like, if my dream is to consult on your art, but you’re a reflection of me, then I’d be fulfilling your dream by allowing you to dramaturg for me.

Regardless of the exact details, I am “open for business”–whichever side of the mirror you want to be on. Waiting for a sign!

xoxo

Alice

*I’m not sure about basically anything I ever write here. Goes without saying, but sometimes I must say it, just in case we all need the reminder.